


if you fall (i will catch you)

by androids_fighting93



Series: never let me go [8]
Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Multi, Set after "build a nest of yellow yarn", some violence/body horror in the beginning, they're not SO bad at communication this time y'all!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-06
Updated: 2018-03-06
Packaged: 2019-03-27 15:52:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,679
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13884114
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/androids_fighting93/pseuds/androids_fighting93
Summary: Kravitz is startled when he falls to hands and knees onto marble tile, rather than the soothing void of the Astral Plane, but it’s tile he knows well; he’s currently dripping blood onto Taako’s kitchen floor. He nearly laughs, or he would if it didn't hurt immensely; for years home has ubiquitously meant the Astral Plane, but now he’d thought of home and brought himself here, to Taako’s feet.





	if you fall (i will catch you)

**Author's Note:**

> First of all I'm SO SORRY for not posting in ages! I have been writing bits and pieces, it's just been a rough/busy time for a few weeks so I haven't made much progress lately. Hoping to remedy that. Have this little thing I threw together, I guess. I honestly can't tell if it's good at all!
> 
> I don't know if the violence in this is quite bad enough to warrant an archive warning, but better safe than sorry and all that.

It wasn't supposed to be like this. All of his intel had prepared him for - not an _easy_ job, death cults attempting to make deals with undead patrons are rarely easy, but Kravitz knows what he’s doing. Sure, their bounties have been out for a while, but they're not enormous. He hadn't even called for backup - Barry was on paperwork duty, Lup patrolling the Stockade; a typical day.

So perhaps Kravitz’s mind isn't completely on the task at hand as he makes his way into the cult’s hideout, possessing demented, grotesque statues in his golem form to get to the ritual chambers without being spotted before he starts his attack. His mind is on how he _finally_ gets to go home tonight after a couple of days of being away tracking down these cult leaders, his only contact with Taako and Magnus a quick stone call the other night, just to keep him updated, to assure him that he would come home safe. Taako was worried, though Kravitz knew he was trying not to show it, and times like these Kravitz is grateful for Magnus, that even when he has to be away from home he isn't leaving Taako alone.

And that's a thought that still makes his chest swell, he can’t quite believe he gets to call that house _home_ , that it’s as much his as it is Taako and Angus and Magnus’s. That this is his life, now. That he has a life, now, even centered around Taako as it is, with all it's minutiae; with breakfasts, and chores, and gardens, and sleep, and sex, and breathing, and illness and a hundred other tiny things he’d forgotten that he’s relearning that make up a life. And if he’s playacting being alive, a little, going through the motions, well, he figures that's the first step toward it feeling real.

He’s cutting down cultists and thinking of surprising Taako by picking up flowers before he comes home when the abomination gets the drop on him.

It’s something new. Something nameless or at least unknown to Kravitz, but he’s been doing this for a long, long time, and he’s never been so caught off guard as he is by the _thing_ that rises from the summoning circle drawn in dried blood on the floor. A homunculus of mismatched parts, not all of them humanoid, gnarled and twisted and rotting, screaming with the pain of its own existence, _wrong wrong wrong_ so wrong it makes Kravitz freeze for a second too long, dizzy with his every instinct as a reaper screaming at him to kill it, not even knowing where to begin.

One of the cultists takes advantage of this while the rest continue to chant what sound like prayers to what they think is their new god (the blasphemy of it makes Kravitz see red), a well aimed _ray of enfeeblement_ sending him to his knees.

“Looks like we’ve caught ourselves a Reaper!” The cultists snarls. “Lucky for you, Orgoth has a taste for fowl, little raven.”

He ignores the taunts, the abomination is free from the chains of it's summoning circle and it’s eyes turn to Kravitz hungry and frenzied. It lashes at two cultists nearest to it, sending them flying to hit the wall behind them with a sickening wet _thump_ ; they don't move, but the others don't pay them any heed. In his enfeebled state he doesn't manage to roll fully out of the way before the abomination is on him, and this close Kravitz can see how it’s enormous serrated claws drip with something foul, something that bubbles and smells like an old corpse. It catches him on the side and across his belly, tears through cloak and leather and flesh because he was an idiot, so distracted by thoughts of home and life and _Taako_ that he hadn't even shifted to his skeletal form. Amateur, pathetic. The cultist laughs mockingly from the sidelines, egging his creation on.

The claws tear through his belly and his blood spills on the floor and he _screams_ , he’s never been immune to pain in this form but there's very little in this world that’s a true threat to him. But this. Oh, it’s more than the pain, more than the blood, it is necrotic and evil and _wrong_ and he wants to _die_ rather than have this in his veins.

He was reckless to come here but he’s not a complete fool, he knows when he’s outmatched. At least he’s taken out a few of the cultists, perhaps disrupted their plans enough to slow them until he can return with backup. The instant he’s out of the abomination’s reach he’s swinging his scythe, a sound like fabric tearing as he thinks _home, home, home_ and opens a rift, a chance to get away so he can quickly heal and reevaluate the situation.

He’s startled when he falls to hands and knees onto marble tile, rather than the soothing void of the Astral Plane, but it’s tile he knows well; he’s currently dripping blood onto Taako’s kitchen floor. He nearly laughs, or he would if it didn't hurt immensely; for years home has ubiquitously meant the astral plane, but now he’d thought of home and brought himself here, to Taako’s feet.

He hears screaming moments after he tumbles through the rift - Angus, he realizes, who has fallen off his footstool at the kitchen counter and is now staring at Kravitz terrified. And Taako - Kravitz lifts his head to look at Taako who has a trembling hand clamped over his own mouth, stunned to silence, and Angus is still screaming. Kravitz reaches a hand out to him but he shrinks back.

“Angus -” Gods but it even hurts to talk, Kravitz grits his teeth. He hadn't intended for them to see him in such a state, but it’s nothing he can't survive. “Angus, I’m alright, don't worry -”

“Like hell you are!” Taako finally moves, kneeling in front of Kravitz, in Kravitz’s blood, and he finally looks down at himself and grimaces. It’s not a pretty sight. His clothes are shredded and wet, the wound wide and spilling and the edges of it carry traces of that evil energy; instinctively he presses a hand to the wound to stem the flow of blood, though it's not necessary. He wishes he could say something really cool, like that most of it isn't his blood, but embarrassingly that’s hardly true. “Jesus, fuck, what do I do, I’m not a fuckin’ healer -”

Kravitz waves him off. “I can handle it, I just need to change my form -” His skeletal form has no blood to spill, no muscle and flesh to tear. He shuts his eyes and wills the shift, feels his flesh begin to dissipate, the pain of the wound fading -

And rushing back in an instant, like running straight at some invisible barrier and bouncing back he gasps and doubles over as the wounds reopen. He looks at his hands, slick and red and flesh, not bone. He’s not transforming. The world spins around him. This body isn’t meant to lose so much blood so fast.  

“Why aren’t you healing?” Taako demands shrilly, hands hovering over him, unsure where to touch.

“I don’t know!” He groans. The pain is worse this time, he can’t stomach looking down at the wound. It’s something magic keeping him from it but he doesn't know what, and finally fear hits him full force, _what did they do to me, why won't I shift?_ “Some kind of poison, I - I don’t know.”

“Ango, get my stone and call Lup, okay pumpkin?” Taako says. He turns around when Angus doesn’t reply, he’s frozen where he landed on the floor, trembling and breathing too hard. Taako snaps his fingers in his face and makes him jump. “Angus!”

“Yes sir!” Angus finally moves, scrambles to his feet to run from the kitchen and out of sight.

“Taako,” he says, reaching for his hand, and Taako ignores the blood and squeezes tight. “Taako, I need to get to the Astral Plane. The Queen can heal me once I’m there. Tell Lup and Barry where I am.”

“Yeah, fuck, I got it,” Taako says, waving a hand, clearly terrified - his ears pointing straight up and quivering - but trying to stay calm. “Go, get out of here!”

He opens another rift, has to sort of roll into it because he can't stand. He sees the horrified look on Taako's face for a second before it closes behind him, before he’s finally enveloped in the soothing cold dark of his Queen’s embrace.

* * *

Kravitz drifts for a time, though he can’t tell how long, through the void of the Astral Plane, in the Raven Queen’s embrace. He isn’t physical here, merely a soul among many. It’s cold, but in a way that comforts him, and he thinks he can feel careful, gentle hands knitting him back together, mending the damage done to his form.

When it’s done, when he’s repaired, it’s an immense relief, like he hadn’t known just how dark the magic infecting him had been until it was gone. He goes to the Queen, reports to her makes what he had seen in the cultists’ lair so that they can make some kind of plan. He can tell that she’s worried - that this is something new, something that even she hasn’t seen before. Something that can, potentially, kill a reaper.

_You were distracted, Kravitz._

He bows his head; if he had a human face, here, he would be flushed red with shame. There's no point in refuting this even if he wanted to, he is a part of her and she knows him, knows his heart. “Yes, my queen,” he says quietly, repentantly.

_We cannot afford that. Especially now._

“Yes, my queen.”

The queen seems to sigh, a sound like ruffling feathers, like wind through trees rattling off their last dead leaves. _I do not fault you for the love you have found, Kravitz. But remember your purpose. Do not let them turn you from it._

He stays quiet, hand trembling in a fist. She’s not wrong, is the worst thing, he _was_ distracted thinking of Taako and Magnus, has wanted his work over quickly just so he could be with them. And because of that he had been hurt, and it could have - should have - been avoided, he should have known what he was going to be facing, should have shifted forms before engaging the monster. But thinking of them as a problem, like some momentary fancy that’s keeping him from his true purpose - he recoils against the thought, and the sudden fear that she’ll command him to leave them.

He doesn't _think_ she ever would, but he doesn’t know what he’d do if she did. After so long alone, how could he go back to that?

 _Go home. Gather your strength,_ she says, and he breathes a sigh of relief.

As soon as he steps through the rift he’s struck by the quiet, and the dim light coming through the kitchen windows. This time the only person he sees is Taako, up to his elbows in the sink as he scrubs at a veritable mountain of dishes.

And now Kravitz realizes that this is because nearly every surface in their immodest kitchen in covered in food of some kind, mostly baked goods, breads and macarons and pies, baking isn't even Taako’s favorite way to cook, but it is his way of dealing with stress. Kravitz's heart sinks at the sight of it all. Taako looks up as the rift opens, his ears standing straight up like he’s had half of his attention focused on waiting for that sound all day. From his expression, Kravitz doesn't know if he should expect a hug or a slap to the face.

“Six. Hours.” Taako finally says, voice thin and high and sharp.

It takes a moment for Kravitz to follow. “Oh. Oh no. Taako, I didn't-”

“Six _fucking_ hours, Kravitz.”

“I needed time for the queen to heal me, I didn’t know -”

“Fuck you - just - _fuck!”_

Kravitz watches helplessly as Taako sinks heavily down to the floor, back against the cabinet doors and face buried in his hands. He realizes suddenly that the floor is spotless, the place where hours ago he had left a pool of blood now clean. He imagines Taako on his hands and knees scrubbing away at the stain, thinking that Kravitz must be dead.

Not knowing what else to do, he sits down in front of Taako, who doesn’t lift his head. He doesn't touch him, though he wants to terribly. It’s hard to be faced with this, with Taako angry at him after the Raven Queen’s lecture - not even a lecture, really, just a statement of fact - but he tries to keep that to himself. “Why are you alone?” He asks softly. “Why didn’t you call Lup, or -  where's Magnus?”

“With the kid,” Taako says, muffled by his hands. He lifts his head, and now Kravitz takes in his bloodshot eyes, the lack of glamour. “I couldn't - I just. Couldn’t do a damn thing for him.”

“Is he - should I go to him, I don’t know -”

“You aren't going _near_ him right now, you think you - took hours for Magnus to get him to stop crying, but yeah, sure, you can just, just be like, see, I’m fine, I’m not literally spilling my guts on the floor now! Fuck!”

“I’m sorry,” Kravitz says, which is clearly the wrong thing because Taako just scowls at him. “I am alright, though, see? I’m healed. I’ll be fine.”

“Been having a panic attack for six fucking hours and Angus is probably traumatized for life cause he basically watched his dad nearly _die_ but sure, it's all fine!”

“Love, if you were panicking why didn’t you call Lup?”

“Well she was pretty fuckin’ busy figuring out if you were dead, you asshole - you think I don’t know how to handle a stupid panic attack? God!”

“I want Angus to know I’m okay.” He starts to move, but stops when Taako makes a strangled noise and reaches for him, eyes wide and frantic. Kravitz sits back down, taking Taako’s hand and squeezing it gently. “Taako, I’m so sorry. I didn't even mean to end up here, earlier, I was trying to go to the astral plane, but -” here he laughs softly, “When I thought of home, it brought me here. To you.”

Taako’s ears droop slightly, eyes softening. “Come here,” he sighs. Kravitz obeys immediately, letting Taako pull him into a too tight embrace, relaxing into his warm arms. “I’m glad you’re okay but I’m _very_ mad at you,” Taako mumbles, face pressed into Kravitz’s neck, gripping the fabric of the back of his shirt too tight.

“I know you are.”

“You’re gone for _days_ \- and like, that’s _fine,_ I get it, that's the job, but then you show up half dead, am I supposed to _not_ freak out, and then Angus - he was terrified and I didn’t know what to do for him. I couldn’t do _anything,_ some guardian I am.”

“Hey.” Kravitz tucks a finger under Taako’s chin, makes him look back up, look him in the eyes. “Don’t do that. You _did_ do something, you let Magnus help.”

Taako bites his lip and nods. “Guess I did.” He sighs and nuzzles in close again, softer this time, gentler, and Kravitz rubs a hand up and down Taako’s back, listening to his breathing gradually even out.

“I didn't mean to worry you,” he says, when Taako finally seems calm again.

“I always worry, this, this shit is _beyond_ worry.” Taako laughs under his breath. “It’s just, if this thing was such a big deal, why wouldn’t you take backup, isn't that what Lup and Barry are there for?”

Kravitz shrugs, looking down. He'd known he'd get a lecture, but that doesn't make it easier. He knows how much he messed this up, but at the same time - he's  _fine,_ he doesn't understand why everyone is still upset when he'd lived to fight another day. “I’ve done this alone for years, Taako. _Centuries._ I’ve gotten into some scrapes, sure, but I handled it.”

“But you don't have to, you know?” Taako sits back up, looking at him so seriously it nearly startles Kravitz, having that look directed at him. “It’s not like that anymore. Not to be gross but, you know. You’re not alone, and all that sappy shit.”

He can’t help but smile at that. “I know.”

“And like, honestly? Even if you think you don't need it I’d rather you call for help than get hurt, especially if we’re dealing with like, some creep that can fuck up a reaper. You’ve gotta be careful.”

“I’ll try.”

That doesn't seem to be satisfying to Taako, who frowns and shakes his head, reaching up to cup Kravitz’s face in his hand and look him directly in the eye. “No, this - this is not fuckin’ _optional,_ Kravitz, you _have to be more careful._ You have a family now, I need you to come home, okay? I…” His ears droop low and he looks down. “Fuck, Krav. I can't lose you, alright?”

It’s rare to hear such honesty from Taako, such raw openness and Kravitz feels bafflingly like he’s going to cry, for a second. _A family._ He hasn’t been able to remember much about his own for a long time, though he knows he had a father, a sister; their faces and their voices lost to time. It feels right, to call these people his family, Lup and Barry, Angus and Magnus, all the rest; centuries alone and he’s stumbled into the biggest family in the multiverse, and Taako is his home. The Raven Queen thinks it’s a distraction, but he knows she’s wrong; it’s his greatest strength. People to support him. People to fight for.

The urge to cry passes, but the emotion doesn’t, and Kravitz leans in closer, touches his forehead to Taako’s. “I’ll always come home. I promise,” he says quietly.

Taako’s breath shudders out of him, puffs against Kravitz’s cheek. “Good.”

They stay like that a while, in the silence, the sun setting and casting the kitchen in dark blue, the smell of entirely too many baked goods wafting over them. They’ll have to have Merle come over with the kids to get rid of some of it; Kravitz has seen the way Mookie can destroy a dessert and it’s horrifying to watch. It’s such a mundane little thought, and Kravitz wonders if he’s really playacting or if this truly is his life, now. He smiles remembering something Taako had said a few moments ago. “Did you call me Angus’s dad?” He says with a smirk.

“Shut up,” Taako groans, but he’s smiling too now. “He’ll never let me live that down if you tell him.”

“Not such a bad thing, to have a surplus of dads…”

“You’re the worst.” Taako glances toward the stairs and sighs. “We should check on him.”

Kravitz stands, offers Taako a hand and they go up the stairs together, hand in hand. Angus’s bedroom is empty but the master bedroom isn’t, and they find them there, Angus nestled in the crook of Magnus’s arm, and he acts so grown up and he’s always getting taller but he still looks so small, so _young,_ half asleep with his head pillowed on Magnus’s chest. In his free hand Magnus is holding a book and he’s reading from it, voice low and slow and gentle, trailing off as he sees them enter.

“Everything good?” He says quietly, trying not to wake Angus, but the boy is already stirring.

“Yeah,” Taako whispers back. He squeezes Kravitz’s hand before leading him forward, toward the bed. “We’re good.” Taako settles on the edge of the bed, looking down at Angus - a rare moment of tenderness apparent on his face. He’ll never admit how much he loves the boy, but he doesn’t have to, Kravitz can see it in every gesture.

Angus finally blinks awake. His eyes are red and puffy, and they dart to Kravitz. “Sir! You’re alive!”

“Well - technically no, still undead, but yeah,” Kravitz says with a smile, settling beside Taako. “I got into a bit of a scrape, but the Raven Queen was able to heal me.”

Magnus gives him a squeeze. “See, kiddo? Nothing to worry about.”

“I’m sorry for frightening you, Angus,” Kravitz says softly. Angus sits up, disentangles himself from Magnus and throws his arms around Kravitz, knocking the wind out of him. He hesitates just a moment, then returns the embrace, closing his eyes.

“I’m so glad you’re okay, sir,” he says, muffled and voice wavering. “Magnus said you would be but you were hurt so bad, nothing’s supposed to be able to kill reapers, I thought…”

Kravitz just squeezes him tight. He had never expected to get so attached to Angus, even when Taako told him that he would be adopting him - he’d just assumed he would be useless with children, after so long with no practice - but it had come easy to him, caring for the boy.

“Alright, scoot over, boychick,” Taako says loudly, unceremoniously shoving his way to the middle of the bed, quickly hiding the tender expression he’d held before. “You stole my spot.” He holds his arms out for Angus, however, and the boy snuggles in beside him as Magnus sets the book aside and pulls them all close.

“Sorry, sir,” he says with a smile and a yawn.

Taako reaches over him, reaches for Kravitz, a soft secret smile on his face. And none of them are dressed for bed but he goes anyway, into the warm tangle of arms and legs that has come to be a thousand times more comforting than the void of the Astral Plane. He lets his eyes drift closed, knowing he can’t stay long but letting himself forget the threats that await him for a moment, knowing his family is close and safe.


End file.
